Therapy San Diego 101: Questions to ask a therapist in San Diego, CA

San Diego is buzzing with activities, and you yourself are busy moving through life tasks day in and day out.  You’ve realized that you need support and help and that you can’t put it off anymore: It is time to enroll in therapy! You’ve identified what you want to work on and marked some of the characteristics of the San Diego therapist who might be a good match for you (see here). You’ve looked through one or more search engines and now have a short list with several potential therapists that you’re ready to reach out to. BUT you are not sure how to select the perfect therapist for you among them. I am here to help you with that! I generated a list of questions that you can use when talking with a therapist for the first time.

Questions to ask a San Diego therapist when you interview them for “fit”:

1.     Are you currently taking on new clients? If not, when will you have an opening for new clients? How can I get on your waitlist?  -- Some therapists may be full now and not enrolling any new clients; however, open slots for therapy follow the rules of a “dynamic field”: though the therapist is full today, tomorrow a client might end therapy which would create an opening. Sometimes, a therapist knows in advance that a client will be graduating from therapy in X weeks and can tell you that they will be available then. Or they can put you on a waitlist (with no commitment on your part) and notify you when they have a new opening.

2.     How much do you charge per session? – Different therapists may charge differently. The fee they charge may depend on their specific specialty, their level of expertise, or seniority in the field.  Some therapists may have a few spots with “a sliding scale”, and you can ask them about that.

3.     Are you paneled (contracted) with my insurance company? – The answer to this question is important if you plan to get your insurance involved in payment for your therapy. There are a few possible scenarios: (a) Your insurance plan might have strict rules about which therapists you can see under your plan. They may cover treatment with only certain therapists (those who are “in-network therapists.”) If this is your situation, and you nonetheless get services from a therapist who is not listed with your insurance, they would not cover for sessions with those therapists

(b) Other insurance companies cover services provided by a much larger pool of therapists, including those who are considered “out-of-network.” In this case you would pay the out-of-network therapists directly. Subsequently, you can ask the insurance company for reimbursement for that payment.

(c) Some people decide to keep their insurance plan out of the picture altogether. They pay their therapist the entire fee without seeking reimbursement from their insurance company.

Whether the first or second scenario better fits your case, this is an important question to ask. A therapist may refer you back to your insurance company to get additional information about your plan benefits for mental health or behavioral health services.

4.     Do you have specialty working with …..? How long have you been treating people who struggle with….? How long have you been a licensed therapist? -- Therapists often specialize in one or more areas of treatment. For instance, they might specialize in working with survivors of trauma, individuals who have phobias, individuals who struggle with addiction, or in treating couples with relationship or marriage problems (this is just a short list of many potential areas of expertise). You might have a sense of your personal area of struggle and would benefit from working with a therapist who is an expert in that area. Don’t shy away from asking the therapist about their level of expertise. You deserve the best!

5.     How often do you meet with your clients? – Many therapists meet with their clients weekly, especially during the earlier stages of therapy, but often also beyond that. Weekly meetings have the benefit of allowing you and your therapist to get to know each other faster, and also will likely result in your making more rapid progress in therapy relative to meeting less frequently. Some therapists may only have an open spot for bi-weekly sessions, or perhaps you may be the one preferring to meet every other week. If you have a specific preference as far as frequency of sessions, I suggest verifying that this fits your therapist’s preferred mode of work. As with everything else, a good fit between you and your therapist is key to a successful course of therapy.

6.     Given what I want to address in therapy, how long do you anticipate my therapy will last? – Different styles or methods of therapy lend themselves to therapeutic courses of varying lengths. Some therapies may yield a good outcome in three months, while others may take longer.  The length of therapy also may depend on your personal therapy goals; if those goals are straightforward, the course of therapy may be quite short [e.g., in the past, when working in an agency, I was sometimes asked to provide “single-session therapy.” These single sessions were found to be effective, even though they required setting up for that in advance and managing that single session differently than a typical first therapy session]. Some people find it helpful to get ongoing support and would not wish for therapy to end quickly. All in all, it is important to discuss your expectations and the therapist’s expectations about how long your therapy may or can last.

7.     What therapy approach would you take with me? – There are numerous approaches to therapy! To name just a few, see Cognitive Behavioral therapy or CBT, Emotionally Focused Therapy or EFT, Psychodynamic therapy, Acceptance Commitment Therapy or ACT, and the list goes on. Your therapist may specialize in one approach or in several.  Whichever they practice, they may do so strictly (e.g., like following a manual), or more loosely, in a gentler, more flexible form. They might also integrate different approaches specifically tailored to each client. Ask your therapist about their preferred approach or what they plan to use when working with you given your therapy goals.

8.     Do you do online therapy, in-person therapy, or both? – The pandemic solidified the viability and effectiveness of online therapy.  Some people prefer to meet online (over video) as that generally saves them time and stress-related to commuting to therapy. Others prefer meeting in-person, and yet others like the hybrid option of sometimes meeting remotely and sometimes in-person. What is your preference?

9.     What is your session cancellation policy? – This is an important question to ask, especially if you feel that you cannot commit to attending therapy regularly. As a rule of thumb, therapists prefer to avoid cancelation of sessions since their livelihood depends on consistent attendance of therapy sessions. Also, good therapy outcome is positively correlated with consistent attendance of therapy sessions. Find out what your therapist typically does when a client cancels a therapy session.

10.  Do you feel you can help me? – Gauge your therapist’s confidence in their ability to address your therapy goal effectively. Don’t hesitate to ask for clarification if you are not sure about their reaction.

A free 15-min therapy consultation in San Diego

I hope that this helped with providing questions to ask when you first talk with a therapist in San Diego. However, if you feel overwhelmed about the process, or you are not sure how to proceed, feel free to contact me for a 15-min phone consultation, where we will discuss your therapy goals and I will share with you whether or not I think I can help. If I can’t help you, I will direct you to other helpful resources. Press here to schedule your phone consultation, or call me at 858-330-0065.